An Example of a Good Personal Statement

I major in Finance in the ******* University of Finance & Economics, which is one of the leading universities for Finance & Economics teaching and research in all of China. My GPA is over 80 (%) and I have an IELTS score of 6.5. I will graduate this summer and wish to obtain my masters degree overseas to prepare me fully for my future career. In 2001, with an excellent performance in the University Entrance Examination I was granted admission in to my university and I chose Finance as my major because it has long interested and enthused me and, with the rapid changes in China’s financial system that are occurring presently, it is an exciting field in which to work.
 
I am now a senior year student and have gained a sound knowledge of finance and a solid academic background in mathematics, computer science and basic economic theory. During these 4 years of systematic learning, I attended many academic activities in school and made good use of all my holidays with full awareness that finance learning needs sufficient practice and experience. Therefore, thanks to these experiences, my analytical ability and problem solving skill has been greatly improved. In a research project about the management of a bank, held by our university last year, I was in charge of the research on the bank’s investment business. As part of this work I turned to many senior managers of banks and companies. During the talks with them, I learned valuable knowledge and information about China’s banking system. Realizing the deficiency and inefficiency of China’s present financial market, I came fully to realize the importance of advanced studies in Finance. Also, this experience gave me new insights into the depth of my field as well as broadening my perspective. Furthermore, English plays more and more important role as a basic tool in my future learning. So I took advantage of my weekends to take part in the English specialty program in school to enhance my English skills.  
 
I feel deeply that an undergraduate degree is far from enough. I am applying for overseas graduate study in the UK because of the fact that Britain holds the leading position in the research of my chosen field. At the same time, I can broaden my perspective by immersing myself in British culture and history. Therefore, it is my desire to pursue graduate study in Finance and Management at **** University. I am excited by the Finance and Management’s course structure and content provided by **** University. I am also attracted by the balance between financial theory and practical business applications, which I believe will be especially attractive to future employers. Such studies, I believe, will put me in a more competitive position in China. I am confident that I will be a valuable member of the faculty’s student body. With my research experiences in China I believe I can add to class debates and contribute to the department overall. My ultimate goal is to work as a senior professional in the investment management industry of China.

Comments

1. OK Length (but one full page is better)
2. Mention of your universities strength, grade score and IELTS
3. A view of why you want to study this major (but not enough detail)
4. Mention of relevant courses already taken (but not enough detail)
5. Good mention of research work experience and how it is related to your future study.
6. Mention of a detail of the course that you particularly like

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